People ask me, “How do I let go of the guilt I have?”

I say, “Well, first describe to me what guilt is for you.

”They say: “Guilt is doing something wrong.”

 I say:  “Doing something wrong is a behavior, right?”

They say:  “Yes.'”

I say:  “Okay, now describe how guilt feels to you.”

They say:  “It’s a mucky feeling in my gut”

I say:  “Describe the feeling,”

They say: “Tight, stuck and miserable.”

I say: “Point to where you feel it the most.”

They say:  “Right here.”

I say :  “How did it get there?”

They say:  “I guess, I put it there.”

I say: “How?”

They say:  “Tightening up around my chest and stomach.”

I say: “And then what happens when you’re tight and constricted inside?”

They say:  “I feel terrible”

I say:  “Is feeling terrible something you deserve? Is it a punishment for something you did?”

They say: “Yes, I hadn’t thought of it that way.”

I say:  “Would you rather be feeling miserable and guilty…or  creating resolution?”

They say: “ Resolution of course! But how do I get rid of that terrible feeling of guilt?”

I say:  First of all, trying to “get rid of” it doesn’t work.

What does work is…

• Admit and greet the guilt.
• Embrace it.
• Breathe into it.
• Talk to it.
• Move and circulate the energy in and out of it.
• Vibrate into it.
• Let it know you won’t abandon it.
• Let it talk to you, and keep conversation going back and forth between you and your guilt.
• Express and feel the guilt…
• Let any shame vibrate and move through you.
• Let it move and circulate.
• Be willing…
• Let go of  holding on inside.
• Allow the guilt to dissolve, resolve and evolve.
• Be willing…
• Freedom is closer than you think! 

Admitting and feeling the guilt can be overwhelming at first…

and if you’re willing to embrace, vibrate and stay with the feeling

 all the way through…

I guarantee you’ll  find a loving, forgiving place inside.

Suddenly you’ll remember you’re a loving person, ready to learn from your experience.  

You will have literally let go of the holding back…

and are ready to apologize to yourself, and whoever else is involved.. (either in person or telepathically.

THE GOOD NEWS IS:  

The part of you that was holding guilt in place…

is free now…

Free to be the part of you who reminds you…

to accept, love and embrace all your experiences,

no matter what the evidence.

To embracing guilt and setting yourself free.

 “How do I know if I’m all the way willing or not?”

My answer is always the same, “You just know, you can feel it.”

Ask yourself this question: “What’s the nature of experiencing willingness?”

Quick Story:

Years ago I was invited to speak at a Peace Conference.

When the co-ordinator asked what

the title of the my presentation was said,

“Why People Hold Back From Peace”.

She stared at me with a surprised look on her face,

then suddenly smiled and said, “I get it, we all need to address this!”

The point of the story is, you are not alone in secretly being unwilling at times.

We all face many of the same day to day challenges

and sometimes find ourselves unwilling to

actually make the changes we say we want.

Willingness is one of the most essential skills for creating the freedom you say you want.

Willingness is the ability to suspend your thoughts

while bringing forth the bodily felt sense of openness to something new.

It takes a suspension of  wherever you are physically,

emotionally and mentally “holding back”.

Willingness creates a crack to allow something new.

It is a  letting go of any static perception of “how things are”,

while releasing tension in your body,

long enough for a shift to happen.

Make sense?

And the wonderful thing is,

even if you open a willing space for at least 10 seconds,

it works!

Yep, a full 10 seconds of suspending the way you have been “holding” things,

will get the ball rolling!

Ten seconds of 100% willingness, not 99.99%,

will open enough of a crack to allow something new!

Believe me, it works so well you may not even notice what’s happening.

Have you ever experienced that?

You wanted something in your life,

made the decision and were willing…

and one day you suddenly you realize what you wanted is happening?

It’s true, when you’re truly willing,

and release the grip on what’s holding you back,

you can wake up one morning and with…

• A new attitude

• Support coming in from all  directions.

• Evidence of change surrounding you.

• Knowing your dream’s are coming true.

You may still be wondering, “How do I know when I’m at 100% willingness?”

It’s funny when I think of all the things I tried to answer that  to question:

• Walked with focused intention on the country roads
• Breathed into my intentions.
• Hung upside down on my couch to  change my way of looking at things.
• Screamed into pillows, hit pillows and danced
• Spent hours in nature
• Did everything I could think of to shift my energy.

All of those things helped, but it wasn’t until

I discovered the “unwilling” part, did things start to change.

Here’s what I learned:

Willingness lives inside us, and we feel and know whether we are willing or not. Our bodies know if we’re holding back.

THE GOOD NEWS IS: Once you admit you’re unwilling, you can shift it!

Some tips on how to be willingness include:

• Admit where you are.
• Rate your willingness on a scale from 1-100% willing. it’s fine wherever you are, as long as you’re willing to admit where you are in the process, you’ll keep making headway.
•  Embrace the part that feels unwilling.
• Breathe into it.
• Let the unwillingness know that you’re not going to push it away again, or pretend that it’s not there.
• Let the unwillingness talk to you, and tell you how it feels to be holding back.
• Talk back and forth until you feel your connection and love for the unwillingness that has been dutifully holding back for you.
• Keep breathing into it.
• Let your energy move and circulate around it, as you let go of the grip you’ve had around it.
• Allow the unwillingness to gently  dissolve, resolve and evolve into willingness.

Notice what happens, and even if you tighten up again,

you’ve created a crack!

A crack to let go into, a doorway for something new to happen.

Willingness is the decision to slip through the crack.

Remember, it’s fine wherever you are.

You’ll keep moving forward as long as you’re 

willing to admit where you are in the process.

In other words…

If I asked you right now: “How willing are you?“.

You might say: “Well Crystal, I think I’m at about 45%”.

I’d say:  “Great! That’s a good start and it means you know what I’m taking about. 

Your openness to explore and admit the truth is where it all begins! 

 Keep checking in with yourself and get reference points on

when you feel the most willingness and

keep expanding on that. 

 Remember, wherever you are in your experience is fine, 

keep embracing whatever you find

and your body will start getting the message 

that willingness is what you want. 

You’re opening  new pathways…

You’re breaking the habit of unwillingness,

and need some time to go thru the withdrawal from holding back.

No amount of convincing will ever get someone to be willing.

It only happens when you’re ready.

Ready to give your consent.

Ready to end the holding back…releasing reluctance and resistance.

With intent for willingness to flow freely,

“Resisto” is an endearing name the children in my life used for describing resistance to the love and fun that’s always available in any given moment.

The image to the right is from a children’s manual

I made for a 2 day children’s experience where

the children were introduced to “resisto”.

They giggled and easily understood who he was.

Have you ever noticed yourself resisting love?

Have you ever wondered if resisting love is inherent in the human condition?

Is resisting love, “just how life is”?

Good questions!

Some deeper questions might be:

• How am I selecting situations perpetuating resistance to love?
• How am I distorting things to prove it’s not safe t0 open to love?
• How am provoking the people in my life so they avoid loving me ?

Allowing love seems to be a challenge we all face at one time or another. 

Have you ever found yourself :

• Wallowing in self pity because someone isn’t loving you the way you think they should?
• Wondering why others seem to be getting all the love and you aren’t?
• Complaining, criticizing, shaming, guilt tripping, and not loving yourself?
• Wishing that you lived in a more loving home situation?
• Wanting to be part of a more loving world?

Well, I’ve spent plenty of time doing that and things changed

one day when I heard someone say,

“Why would anyone love you, if you aren’t  loving yourself?”

I thought to myself, “Good point!”

I immediately remembered how much I whined and fussed

about not having the love  I said I wanted.

Dang, I was blaming everyone on the outside

when it was really an inside job!

Needless to say, a passion was ignited in me to

discover how I could truly love myself, no matter what the evidence.

It was then that I made the decision to

accomplish what seemed like an almost impossible feat for me,

letting go of resistance to loving myself.

CLICK HERE  for more on loving yourself, no matter what the evidence.

If you have any questions, feel free to book a  FREE 30 minute conversation with me. 

CLICK HERE  to set up a good time to talk,

To allowing love,