Crystal Presence Online

We all know people who provoke in ways that enrage and exasperate us. Those who seem to thrive on driving people away. What if we admitted that we were provokers too? That sometimes we provoke the ones we love when really we are really wanting love? What if we admit that people are distancing themselves from us?  What if we admit and embrace the provoker within? What if we make the decision to part of the resolution rather than provoking another problem?

Robert Firestone, well known therapist and author of The Fantasy Bond, shares his perspective that provocation is part of a defense mechanism.  A false boundary that limits our ability to pursue or accept real love and connection. A good example is Fanny who always takes over a conversation. She talks too much and makes assumptions about what other people are thinking. She notices that people are avoiding her. She wonders what is wrong them and decides she is better off just being alone.

So what can we do when if we find ourselves provoking? We can observe our behavior, breathe and take a moment to ask ourselves if we like the effect we are having. Are we are making assumptions about the other person? Are we listening? Are we asking the other person what they are thinking?

Often we are unaware of how we are provoking the people around us. In an addicted society provoking is a familiar way to keep deep connection and love away. We do have the ability to observe and notice when we are starting a downward spiral into wanting to provoke. We can identify snapshots of memories that triggered us. We can awaken in those moments  that we decided to hold back and assemble provocation by being…

• contrary
• angry
• a liar
• opinionated
• sullen
• playing mind games
• interrupting
• bullying
• judging
• arguing
• criticizing
• whining and complaining
• always late
• dramatizing
• withholding
• sarcastic
• talking too much
• self focus
• not listening
• mean
• insensitive
• worrying
• trying to be right
• complaining
• focused on the problem rather than the solution

We can rewire those choices and take the drivers seat.  We can end the habit of provoking in the following ways…

• Observing and admitting our motivations for what we do and say.  Let go and make new choices.
• Treat our provocation as a habit we can change. (1) Observe and notice what triggers us to provoke. (2) Make a detailed list of thoughts, feeling and behaviors we assemble whenever we find ourselves provoking. (3) We then can make a detailed list of thoughts and behaviors we could do instead of proceeding with the provocation. (4) Practice releasing the habit. 
• Go through withdrawal like we would do with any other habit. Letting go may be uncomfortable at first as we are going into the unknown.
• Let our trusted friends know that our intention is to bring love and connection into our relationships. Ask them to support us if we start to  provoke.
• Read The Fantasy Bond by Robert Firestone for increasing awareness of why we provoke.
• Release limiting beliefs..
• Move and circulate our energy. Walk, dance, do yoga, meditate, sing and whatever keeps us open to new possibilities. Practice letting go and feeling joy.

About the author:

Crystal is a certified expansion guide with the Total Integration Institute. An author, multidimensional coach and facilitator for the live event called Freedom at the Core. She is the instructor and coach for her online course, Freedom From the Inside Out.  She draws from her own experience and the experience of the thousands of people she has worked with over the past 35 years. Crystal is known for the fun and empowering way she supports people in bringing forth the experiences they want in their lives. Currently she is writing a series of children’s books that embrace the principles of living freedom.

“Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” Albert Einstein

Evolutionary Education is a living process driven by inspiration, curiosity and passion. To make the changes that we want to see in our world we need to shift the way we think, feel and behave. As parents and teachers we are role modeling by what we do, not what we say. We must transform our outdated methods of educating by letting go of trying to shape our children by having them memorizing facts and defining them through standardized testing. What if we restore their freedom with a new context of  evolutionary education? Education as a living process?

In his groundbreaking book, The Future of Children, Phillip Moore makes it clear that “in order to navigate this next evolutionary passage where we mature into self-intelligent co-creators, we need to shift our views” about education. Free ourselves from an addictive culture while cultivating the confidence to be part of the resolution in making our planet thrive. Asking ourselves the question what is the nature of experiencing an evolutionary education that brings out the best in everyone and our planet?

We can bring forth a new evolutionary education by…

Knowing that love is fundamental to who we are. Feeling that we belong in an environment of loving kindness. Knowing we are loved and connected as we explore our place in the web of life.

Exploring and discovering the miracle of play. Sacred territory where children can open their minds to merge and blend the real with the unreal, from invisible playmates to adventures that are outside time and logic.

Being in the natural world as much as possible. The natural world provides the complexity and depth, the variety and challenges that foster intricate neural pathway  development. In her mesmerizing book, Braiding Sweetgrass, Robin Wall Kimmerer takes us on a beautiful journey with interconnection of all life. Children who learn this interconnection and fall in love with the natural world will protect, defend and nurture it as they grow to adults.

Learning how to be part of the resolution. Learning to physically, emotionally and mentally stay present and make sober choices in chaotic and challenging times. Embracing our faith in the greater intelligence to always be there to guide us in coming to resolution.

Cultivating the art of paradigm shifting. Learning to live in process. Releasing ourselves from trying to control and manipulate as a way to get our lives perfect, right and done. Knowing that we are one and connected to a loving source and it’s greater intelligence..

Moving, vibrating expressing and circulating our energy. Opening space for joy, fun and discovering new possibilities. Learning with our whole bodies by engaging all of our senses to receive resolution.

Exploring the art of meditation. Learning to connect with ourselves as we disengage from any addictive control. The space to expand our ability to change beliefs and envision the experiences we want.

Creating safety and trust from the inside out. Taking physical and emotional risks as we venture into unknown territory while also learning how to strategize and overcome fears. Knowing that we can make mistakes without being diminished, shamed or ridiculed.

Surrounding ourselves with healthy relationships. Learning to trust our internal guidance on the most appropriate forms, times and places for every relationship. Discovering healthy boundaries.

Awakening curiosity. Opening to explore, discover and learn new things. Seeking out new ideas and adventures into the unknown.

Engaging in the art of manifestation. Seeing an idea all the way through from a vision, decision, intention, insights and actions to the full manifestation.

Expanding our self esteem. Experiencing kindness and appreciation of ourselves for who we are, not for what we do or how well we perform or conform to the the expectations of others. Freeing ourselves from comparison and competition (for Greek athletes the word competition meant “to strive together”).

Making every day an adventure. Turning a simple picnic, bike ride or walk into something magical. Experiencing how greeting the day with an adventurous spirit changes our approach to life in a profound way.

Creating community. Our future is calling us to collaborate like no generation before. The environmental, economic, political, and personal issues facing us can only be solved in a new context of co-operation and community. Collaborating with others who share our values, intentions and willingness to take full responsibility. Drawing from the wisdom of elders such as Diamond and River Jameson, facilitators of Living Freedom. A sacred space where people from all over the world gather to emerge themselves in an evolutionary education that is shared in fun and dynamic way.

About the author: Crystal is a certified expansion guide with the Total Integration Institute, author, multidimensional coach and facilitator for the live event called Freedom at the Core. She is the instructor and coach for her online course, Freedom From the Inside Out. She draws from her own experience and the experience of the thousands of people she has worked with over the past 35 years. Crystal is known for the fun and empowering way she supports people in bringing forth the experiences they want in their lives.

www.crystalpresenceonline.com

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In turbulent times we ask ourselves if we can stay present, make good choices and feel free. We may find ourselves struggling, feeling angry, scared, stressed and powerless in the midst of it all. We understand the concept of breakdown/breakthrough yet sometimes find it challenging to stay fully present through the ups and downs. We dream about freedom, talk about it, have fleeting moments of it but are not sure how to make it a sustainable experience. We ask ourselves if freedom is it even possible?

At the same time science is proving the oneness of us all, that we are not separate from anyone, anything or our source. There is the growing awareness that what we experience on our inside is affecting everything we experience on the outside. We are coming to realize that we are shaping our lives by how we think, feel and behave. We are also learning that all the insights, resolutions and answers we want are available to us when we stay connected with ourselves and source. What if we knew that what we are cultivating on the inside is what we are realizing on our outside? What if we knew that freedom is not dependent on anyone or anything on the outside? Take a deep breath and ask the powerful question what is the nature of experiencing freedom from my inside out?

Freedom from the inside out is NOT about looking for a way out or trying to fix ourselves. It is an undoing while engaging in empowering ways to live our lives. It is not about needing to be happy or in a state of equanimity at all times. It is about knowing that we can always choose to make a shift. It is not about trying to get perfect, right and done nor focusing on what seems wrong with us and trying to fix it.

Freedom from the inside out IS about knowing that the relationship we cultivate on our inside is being realized on our outside. it takes the courage to do what many people are not even willing to talk about for fear that that their lives will fall apart. It is about letting go of the patterns of tension and constriction that we use to hold back. It is about awareness of our perspectives, thoughts and emotions as we learn to embrace, interact and release them. It is the willingness to keep our energy in motion as we practice new ways of thinking, feeling and behaving. It requires letting go of having a certain outcome, trusting that the most beneficial experiences will manifest in all their perfect ways. It is about seeking and discovering the easiest and most fun ways to dissolve, resolve and evolve whatever is holding us back.

We are coming to realize that the more responsibility we take the more freedom is available to us. We recognize that everything appearing in our lives is happening in it’s perfect timing. We realize that our wants and needs are part of the pulse of evolution that is propelling us forward. We know that our source wants the very best for us and is guiding our lives. We begin to see ourselves in new and expanding ways while empowered to share our gifts. We recognize that we are being a catalyst for the changes we want to see in our world. Once we get the hang of how this works it propels us to move forward and never go back!

A value process for connecting with ourselves…

Gather four pillows. Designate each pillow as a specific aspect of yourself. One pillow for the aspect that guides you. The remaining pillows represent emotions, heart and body. Begin a dialogue with each aspect. You may  find that your emotions are angry about how often you avoid, deny and control them. They may want to scream, cry and hit the pillow in anger about feeling abandoned, imprisoned and denied by you. You can respond by telling them your side of the story. Continue interacting, feeling and expressing.  Let each aspect interact and express in a similar way. Allow them to know the changes you will make.

As your own best guide you are empowering yourself to see the internal environment you have been creating. With a new sense of clarity you can guide all aspects of yourself in a new and expansive way. You can engage in creating safety, unconditional love and freedom from your inside out.

Everything becomes a map to freedom, with wonderful gifts that can guide you. 

I invite you to join in on my new online course, Freedom From The Inside Out. 

Clink here for more information: https://crystal-s-school-aade.thinkific.com/courses/freedom-from-the-inside-out

To your freedom,

“If you do not know how to handle the suffering in you then you cannot help another person” Thich Nhat Hanh

In a world with so much suffering we do our best to be compassionate as part of the resolution. Compassion is seeing a living being suffering and feeling motivated to help them. While doing our best to be of help we sometimes take on the suffering inside ourselves. We constrict our emotions, bodies, minds and hearts. In doing this we lose our ability to be fully present with whatever the situation. It makes us wonder if we are being part of the resolution or part of the problem?

A perfect example of this is Caroline, a sixty year old woman who was very ill and learning how to be at peace with her experience. Her friend, Emily, came to see her and panicked when she saw her condition. Emily’s intent had been to be compassionate and supportive. Unfortunately, her reaction was to constrict with guilt for not having come sooner. Caroline tried to soothe and console her and soon felt her energy fading. She politely told Emily that she needed to be alone now. What might have happened if Emily had kept her focus on breathing, staying connected and tuning into what her friend was really wanting? What if she had been present to be part of the resolution rather than being part of the problem?

Some tips on what we can do if we find ourselves slipping out of being present and part of the resolution…

• Reconnect with ourselves and our source. Breathe and allow any insights on appropriate actions we can take in the situation.

• Move, breathe and vibrate. Release any constriction of our emotional, physical and mental energy. Let go of trying to control the situation as we breathe, vibrate and move into a state that allows us to tune into what is really happening. Opening a soothing safe space for the person suffering to relax and let go into their experience.

• Love ourselves no matter what the evidence! No matter what the condition we are seeing, talk to ourselves in ways that support us in embracing our experience so we can be present with calm and assertive energy.

• Ask ourselves what is the nature experiencing true compassion?

• Practice having compassion for ourselves. When we learn to accept and reframe our own experiences we can support others to do the the same.

• Establish healthy boundaries. There is always the temptation to think we have to save someone even if we feel that it is not ours to do. The suffering person knows when we really do not want to be there for them. If we override our intuition we end up not being as effective as we could be. It is best to go where we feel inspired, motivated and want to help.

• Remember that we are human. We are all in an evolutionary process of exploring ways to think, feel and behave in ways that we can support the end the suffering in the world.

• Acknowledge and embrace the fact that no-one really knows what another person is really experiencing.

• Vibrate any healthy shame. We all have times when we find ourselves making poor choices in a situation. These are opportunities to love ourselves no matter what the evidence, make new choices and avoid the temptation to contract in shame.

• Embracing any self pity. Practice letting go of our own self pity. Remember we are the ones that put us in whatever pit we are in and so did they. A good exercise is pretending to cry while repeating “poor me, poor me, poor me” until we find ourselves laughing and remembering the profound miracle that we are even alive.

• Cultivate the ability to be compassionate about differences. Dr. Don Beck, a leading global authority and author of Spiral Dynamics, shows us how and why people are different in the way they make decisions, respond to different situations, hold onto values and make changes. This includes everything from different life stages, lines of development and levels of consciousness. Another great source is Hudson and Riso’s book, The Wisdom of the Enneagram, on how to be compassionate and supportive of many different personality styles.

• The best thing we can do is remember that when our vibration rises to spiritual expression we embody those human qualities that enable us to do what is good and right for ourselves and others.  All of these qualities are connected in thought and deed. They are widely valued virtues found in every religion, culture and community.

To being the power of true compassion,

Haters are usually thought of as people who greatly dislike and criticize a person, group or thing. Haters are are often talked about, shamed and blamed for many of the problems in the world. As we look for resolution we often overlook the part of us that is secretly a hater too. We may be hating ourselves or others who we believe are ruining our lives. We may be hating ourselves for wondering if bombing, exterminating and imprisoning haters might be the best way to get rid of them. We also may be hating the vulnerability and powerlessness we feel about not having control over the thoughts, feelings and behavior of others in world. What if we decide to acknowledge and embrace the hater within? What if acknowledge the reflection of hate that we see in the world to learn more about ourselves and others? What if we set our hater free to be a loving catalyst for the changes we want to see in the world?

Examples of how to embrace and set our hater free.

• Releasing the belief that hating is bad or wrong. Bringing understanding into hate as an emotion that rises up inside to alert us that it time to make a change. It starts with irritation, annoyance, frustration, anger and eventually grows to hate and crisis if we do not respond to ourselves. Wherever we find ourselves hating we can embrace, express and love it back to love and wellness.
• Allowing the hater within to express how it thinks, feels and behaves. Once we learn how connect and embrace the hater inside we can bring compassion and love to any hateful condition. A great exercise is to find a safe space to express the word hate. Start by pronouncing the word out loud as haaaaaaaaaa-te (sounds like hay-te).Then turn up the volume (hitting some pillows or yelling it into a cupped hand can speed up the process). Notice how expressing the sound opens up a pathway from the throat down to the spine. Now listen while we let the hater speak. Respond when we are ready. Vibration and interaction brings love, compassion and understanding to wherever we want and need it.
• Engaging in lots of physical, mental and emotional movement. Dancing, singing, running, walking, breathing and whatever shifts our vibration to alignment with self and source. This creates space for something new to happen and change beliefs such as haters are “just who they are” to “all beings are love and always will be”.
• Staying connected to ourselves, our source and the internal guidance system that we each have to guide us to peace, love and freedom.
• Noticing if we are trying to ignore our true feelings about haters. Ignoring makes hate crop up with greater force and persistence as in mass shootings, growing numbers of hate groups and other forms of unrest and violence.
• Acknowledging that we live in an addicted society that promotes the avoidance of feelings. Much of our society tries to drink, drug and bomb hate away. Pushing  parts of ourselves away drains our power and can leave us feeling powerless and hateful. Leaders such as Diamond and River Jameson, founders of the leading edge process, Living Freedom, show us how taking full responsibility for reclaiming the reflection of the hate that we see in our world. Taking full responsibility is the key to bringing forth a new context of living that supports love wellness for all beings.
•  Learning not to take our hater personally. Letting go of using haters (whether inside or out) for keeping the addictive cycle of hatred going. Releasing fixation on hate to focus our energy on allowing resolution.
• Noticing if we are carrying peace signs along with hate signs. Hate signs about corporations, politicians or whoever we think is disrupting our peace. The vibrational energy we have for whatever sign we carry perpetuates more of what we want or do not want
• Reaching out in conversations with others. Asking questions about the motivation behind hate. What is behind wishing someone would die as a way to resolve an uncomfortable condition? Behind every hater is a story. We all are love no matter what the evidence.
• Envisioning a loving and peaceful world. Trusting that the hate and crisis in the world is part of what is ultimately guiding us to love.
• Asking powerful questions such as what is the nature of experiencing a world free of hate?
• Remembering we do not need to have all the answers. Wherever there is a problem there is a resolution.

To the power of our emotions,

Anger is rising as we make an enormous shift in human consciousness. If we look outside of ourselves to find resolution we feel angry that we are not able to control how others think and behave. If we try to hold back the anger we create an internal war within ourselves. It is easy to forget that anger is an ally that alerts us to when we need to make a change, a change that can lead us to a path of peace.

We know that change starts with each of us. We know we need to change our perspective on to how communicate and behave with others in the world. The question is how do we use anger in a safe and constructive way? Some say to control the anger and some say express it. Some say learn to forgive, think positive and meditate. Some think that anger leading to violence is and inevitable part of the human experience.

What if we embraced our anger as an ally? What if we embraced it as a signal that guides us in our aliveness? What if we listened to it’s signals at “point easy” when our anger is still frustration or annoyance? What if acknowledge when we hold back and turn our anger into resentment and upheaval with ourselves and others? What if we stop festering anger into self-hate and directing it toward others? What if we rememberthat we can only love and accept others as much we are loving and accepting ourselves?

What if we use our anger in the following constructive ways?

(1) Acknowledge the nature of the addictive culture we live in. A culture which promotes  work addiction, drugs, movies and violence as a way to avoid and deal with our emotions. An example is the unhealthy ideal of masculinity boys have often been taught to live up to. An ideal tells men that real men should do everything on their own, not cry and express their anger through violence.

(2) Cultivate the ability to express our feelings in a safe and nurturing place. Try out this exercise…

•Find an appropriate place to express the word hate (as it sounds).

•Think of someone that triggers anger.

•Notice what happens when you express the haaaaaa part of hate (sounding like hay…exaggerate it) all the way down your throat and down to the end of your spine.

•Explore hitting some pillows or holding your hand over your mouth as you express.

•Open your jaws wide and end the sound with an abrupt te as you blow the air out.

•Notice how movement and vibration loosens control and  opens a new pathway.

•If you express long enough (depending on how much you have held back) might find yourself bursting into tears wondering how you could have done or said what you did.

•You have opened to love, compassion, space to change beliefs and allow something new to happen.

(3) Distinguish the difference between toxic and healthy anger. Healthy anger is a desire to make a change. It also alerts us when we need to have healthier boundaries. Toxic anger is when we choose to use our anger to destroy ourselves and others.

(4) Discover the difference between discerning and judging. Discerning is observation of ourselves or others. Judgement is deciding that there is something inherently wrong and bad with what we see.

(5) Cultivate the ability to see from different perspectives and different levels of consciousness. Learn how people differ in their values and different ways of resolving anger and conflict. Don Edward Beck, author of Spiral Dynamics, describes an evolutionary model that is supporting responsible leadership for peace around the world. It is a great way to bring understanding and compassion into the dynamic interaction between people and culture.

(6) Be willing to admit that we do not have all the answers.

(7) Stay connected to our source and internal guidance system. Remember that all beings are all connected with the same universal intelligence.

(8) Trust the process.

(9) Understand that perturbation is necessary for evolution. There is a natural time of unrest and chaos as we breakdown the old and breakthrough to the new.

(10) Be open to change our minds, beliefs and values. Through conversation and reaching out to others we can learn about their humanness and desire for a better world.

(11) Assume that people are good at heart. All humans have a life that has been shaped in many different ways. Learn to understand where they are coming from and let them know that they are being heard.

(12) Cultivate the ability to have a peaceful argument. Let people know how you feel and how you came to your conclusion.

To allowing the path to resolution,

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In turbulent times we find ourselves wondering if human beings will allow the Earth be a place where all living things can live in harmony. We long for a collective experience of governing where war and destruction are no longer a way to create resolution. We ask ourselves how we can participate as part of the resolution while releasing ourselves from being part of the problem.

The first step in making this change is the willingness to see things from a different perspective. It means changing beliefs about the essential nature of human beings and asking ourselves what it will take to truly humanize the world.

It means understanding that we already have everything we need to turn things around and we can…

1. Embrace the turbulence inside of ourselves, taking full responsibility for our manifestation from our inside out. Asking ourselves if we are part of perpetuating a government that is not of, by and for the people.
2. Be leaders of change by changing the way we lead ourselves. Begin by having a meeting with ourselves. Set our four sitting pillows. One for ourselves as the spirit that is making the decisions for ourselves. The other three pillows act as our emotions, body and heart. Start a conversation with each of them. Ask them how they feel about their lives and how we are governing them. Listen to what they have to say. For example, a response from our emotions might be, “I’m tired of being repressed and pushed aside, then blamed for the oppression, suffering and powerlessness you feel. I am your inner guidance system and repressing me disempowers all aspects of us”. Our bodies might say, “You override and push me to exhaustion, I hate you!” Respond and continue until you come to resolution. Come to a place of governing ourselves in peace, freedom and building confidence in ourselves and others.
3. Draw upon the wisdom of indigenous people, such as the Six Nations of the Iroquois people who comprise the oldest living participatory republic on earth. Their story is of a governance that is based on the consent of the governed and aligning with the wisdom of nature. Most people are not aware that the original United States representative democracy, fashioned by authors as Benjamin Franklin and Thomas Jefferson, drew inspiration from these intelligent people.
4. Allow the power of nature to guide us. With inspiration from the visionary Matt Powers, author and teacher, we clearly see the world through nature’s eyes. In his groundbreaking books and curriculums we can learn how to cultivate a deeper understanding of returning to a world of sustainability and regeneration..
5. Cultivate awareness that we are all connected to the same source and that the resolutions are within each of us. Innovators such as Barbara Marx Hubbard, founder of The Conscious Evolution Institute, reminds us that can reimagine who we are as humans and change our future.
6. Renew ourselves with knowing that yesterday is not the same as today. Allow our moment to moment choices to be part of the evolutionary expansion of what is possible.
7. Embrace technology as part of a collective nervous system that is saying yes to change. Communicate with cultures around the world.
8. Meditate. Create a silent space for ideas and inspiration to arise from the greater intelligence within each of us.
9. Create a movement by to keeping our energy in movement. Allow our bodies to move as we open the space inside for new possibilities. Let go of trying to control and manipulate to have the changes we want.
10. Attune to the evolutionary impulses that are awakening and alive within each of us. Change our perspective of conditions such as racism and terrorism.
11. Acknowledge that we are equal and distinct individuals with a part to play in the whole. Support each person in their unique part of the resolution.
12. Intend, envision and pray for all living being as the celebration of the dignity of our needs as living beings.
13. Respect the nature of breakdown and breakthrough. As cultural media blows up the possibility of existential breakdown, we can stand in knowing that we are connected to a loving source that embraces us in the process of breakthrough.
14. Notice if we are using people to get a “disgust fix”. We must ask ourselves if we habitually use politics, economics and other people to stay in the bodily felt sense of self importance, hate and disgust. Do we use those to cover up our own feelings of self rejection, anger and powerlessness to make the changes we want?
15. Ask empowering questions,“What is the nature of experiencing myself as a catalyst for the beneficial changes I want to see in the world?”

To the power of being a catalyst in the world by being the changes we want,

In times of major change in the world we find ourselves looking for ways to stabilize and humanize our lives. We know we are entrenched in an old continuity, yet find ourselves wondering if “this just how life is”. There is also is a deep rooted fear that shifting our continuity might threaten our survival. We also know that whether the change is physical, mental or emotional, we experience withdrawal. In this case, we experience withdrawal from a self-defeating continuity to a context of well being and living freedom.

In a culture promoting lack of connection with self and and source, we yearn for a new context of living. Fortunately, there are many ways to shape our lives. Not only can we choose to survive, but also thrive. Many visionaries refer to this shift as “being in the culture, but not of it”. It requires the ability to observe, be present and willing to be making new choices of how we think, feel and take actions in our lives.

Jean Liedloff, author of “The Continuum Concept”, spent several years deep in the South American jungle living with the Stone Age Indians. Her experience changed her perception of human nature. She noticed how her own culture had lost much of it’s natural sense of well-being. She commented that , “I seldom had a clear sense that these people were of the same species as ours. The children were uniformly well-behaved, never fought, were never punished, always obeyed happily and instantly”. The children co-exited in the midst of strong, busy central figures to whom they were peripheral. Not surrounded by stressed out adults who are trying to control their behavior to seek acceptance and approval from their culture.

In the quest for appropriate experiences, more and more people are making the quality of their lives the highest priority. They are following their inner guidance while allowing the details of their vision to be revealed as the old continuity dissolves, resolves and evolves. They know if they continue to deny their internal guidance they may find themselves in the middle of crisis (i.e. getting sick, having accidents, getting a divorce etc). They understand that crisis is often a way to get a multidimensional kick in the butt to make the changes they have been wanting.

Withdrawal from an old continuity requires making a decision and  being fully presence. In a state of sobriety we build power and release ourselves from thinking we are powerless victims of our continuity. We can make powerful choices, focus, keep our energy in motion, shift our perceptions and realize the truth of how our lives can really be. We can experience the joy of a new context living by releasing ourselves from the old self defeating continuities such as…

• Isolation
• Obsessive work
• Emotional reactivity
• Thought patterns
• Drive for success
• Lies

How to embrace a new continuity…

• Give ourselves time and space to establish new pathways. Release stored emotions, tension, toxins and other by-products of holding back.

• Embrace and keep breathing through any discomfort we are feeling.

• Ask the powerful question: What is the nature of experiencing the most beneficial context of living for myself and my world?

• Connect with self and our source. Embrace the greater intelligence within us. Let it guide us to all we need.

• Move, vibrate, circulate and release any tension and contraction in our bodies, emotions and minds. Open the space to change old self defeating beliefs and perceptions, while releasing reluctance and resistance.

• Notice, integrate and take action on what is working.

• Allow the process to unfold in it’s perfect timing. External changes happen on an energy level first.

• Remember that pushing against hooks us to the problem instead of releasing us to the resolution.

• Being curious about the continuities of other cultures.

• Get clear on what makes us feel happy, free and fulfilled.

• Connect with others who are wanting the same context of living that we want.

• Love ourselves, no matter what the evidence.

• Trust the process.

• Focus on what we like about ourselves and others.

• Embrace and draw upon the wisdom from our past. Release any guilt or held resentment.

• Be aware of any secretly held control plans we use to prove that our old continuity is working.

• Keep it simple! Addictive continuities make our lives feel complicated  powerless to change.

• Remember that the parts of ourselves we tend to deny and repress are usually our greatest strengths.

• Inspire ourselves with music, inspiring talks etc.
• Spend lots of time in nature.
• Be 100% (not 99.99%) willing to suspend the old continuity for at least 10 seconds to ignite a change.
• Be aware that just before a change is about to happen,  we may be tempted to go back to how it was.
• Allow ourselves the  joy of experiencing a new continuity.

To the power of choice and freedom,

Crystal

We know we are in the biggest shift in human consciousness. We strive to be part of the resolution, yet with all our good intentions we find ourselves repeating what we know is part of the problem. We find ourselves engaging in our old controlling and addictive ways of thinking, feeling and behaving. When we get honest with ourselves, we admit to the voice inside telling us we are lying as a way to tolerate our lives.

We love the idea of letting go and going with the flow. At the same time we fear that our lives will fall apart and we will end up alone and die if we disengage from the addictive control.

Control has become the culturally acceptable way of dealing with our feelings of powerlessness. We sense the pervasiveness of how it affects our lives and our world. We look for pathways to create a new context of living and know we will be happier and healthier when we can do the following…

• Remain present and honest with ourselves.
• Admit when the jobs we have are not right for us.
• Spend our days doing the things we love to do.
• Spend more time with the people we love.
• Take better care of ourselves.
• Let go thinking what we should do and allow ourselves to follow our internal guidance system.

Ann Wilson Schaef author of “When Society Becomes an Addict” says, “Not only does our society invite addiction, it requires addiction to tolerate the society we have created”.

Addiction is how we distract, control and disconnect ourselves from the truth of what we are really thinking, feeling and doing. When we feel powerlessness to stop the addiction, we are tempted to lie about it. Whether it is an ingestive addiction (drugs, nicotine, alcohol, etc) or a process addiction (obsessive thinking, worrying, self generated feelings, money etc), addiction interferes with our natural life processes. It interferes with our thinking, feeling and internal guidance system that is our natural way of knowing what is good for us.

The following are how addictions erode our connection with ourselves and others:

• Dishonesty: Lying to ourselves and others.
• Self Centeredness:  Thinking, feeling and behaving in ways that are motivated out of our need to control everyone and everything. Believing that others are either for or against us.
• Illusion of Control. Thinking can be in control of everyone and everything.

Notice how these very same addictive choices are rampant in our politics, media, education, corporations, medical institutions and other aspects of our society. Most of us can relate to this, yet find it elusive to grasp the subtle and pervasive ways that addiction has a grip on us. We wonder how to know if we are addicted. The simplest answer is that we know.

Intimacy with ourselves is the key to disengaging from the addictive control. People fear that letting go of addiction will be hard. The truth, however, is that trying to keep everything under control is the hardest and most destructive thing we can do to ourselves.  Disengaging from the addictive control is one of the easiest most natural things we can do.

The following are some of the ways we can disengage and free ourselves from the addictive control…

• Cultivate the awareness that we are literally connected to all that is.
• Realize that we are vast multidimensional beings connected to the loving source that is creating us.
• Admit and feel any powerlessness.
• Engage in enjoyable movement to keep our energy flowing and open to change.
• Spend time with ourselves.
• Let go of thinking that life is static and it is our responsibility to get it under control.
• Become aware of any addictive control plans we use to keep selecting, distorting and provoking our reality so we can prove to ourselves that we need to stay in addictive control to survive.
• Release ourselves and others as objects that need to be controlled and fixed.
• Let go of any addictive intellectual constructs, methodologies, interpretations, rational or logical constructs that keep us fixated in an old context of living.
• Connect with our internal guidance system to find the way to what is best for us.
• Let go of trying to be perfect, right and done.
• Allow our life process to unfold and reveal itself in the perfect time, place and form.
• Surround ourselves others who want to join us in the journey.
• Be aware of the withdrawal experience. Keep our energy moving to allow space for the old habits to dissolve, resolve and evolve.
• Receive our power to co-create with our loving source the lives of joy, creativity, fun, ease, abundance and wellness we want.

To Freedom,

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Freedom is referred to as the power to think, feel or act without restraint. People often restrict their freedom by fixating their attention, feelings and behaviors on someone or something. Fixating is a way to distract and avoid the truth of what is really happening. We go from feeling happy and free to feeling miserable and restricted.

It is not uncommon to hear people say, “If only that person were different I would feel happy and free.” Most people have at least one person who annoys, bugs or hooks them into fixating in some way.

A good example is Fixation Fanny who is particularly fixated on her co-worker, Julie. Fanny thinks Julie is self important. Fanny gets a “disgust fix” every time she thinks about Julie. Fanny then moves to another city and is glad she will never see Julie again. She soon meets Larry at her new job. Larry likes to tell sarcastic jokes which is a perfect reason for Fanny to fixate and carry on with her habitual disgust fixes.

Fixation takes an enormous amount of energy and drains our power to be creative and expand our consciousness. The most common fixations are guilt, stress, suffering and feeling barely alive. Fixations make our lives feel like a burdensome task while waiting for the impending experience called death.

Sorcerer-seers such as Don Juan and Carlos Castaneda have referred to our ability to shift between difference states of consciousness as “shifting the assemblage point”. Generation after generation of fixating at any certain assemblage point makes it feel that there is only one “real world”. Don Juan referred to this phenomena as “the “modality of the time”. A modality is held together by a mass agreement field, both verbal and telepathic, our belief systems and judgements.

A good example is guilt. Notice what happens when we feel guilty. Our breathing becomes shallow and we fixate our energy. If the guilt is about our children, they see us fixated in guilt when we look at them. It starts a process of wondering about what’s so wrong about them that their parent feels so guilty about them. This is the classic of example of the how the assemblage point of guilt is passed on generation to generation.

The good news is that we have the power to shift our assemblage points to a place of freedom, love, pleasure, joy and full aliveness. A great question to ask ourselves is: What is nature of experiencing freedom from my inside out?

Noticing when we are fixated can be illusive. It seems normal to be having a wonderful day and suddenly without even noticing it, we slow down our breathing and begin to feel out of sorts with ourselves. We start to wonder what is wrong with us and look for ways to get back to our happy day. Most of us can relate to the classic behavior heading to the refrigerator to find that special something that will fix the way we feel.

The following are great examples of how we can go from a sense of happy and free to feeling restricted and unhappy.

• Having a delicious meal to fixating in guilt about eating it.
• Happy mode to complaining mode.
• Self content to conjuring up something to worry about.
• Relaxed to fixating on pushing ourselves to exhaustion..
• Loving ourselves to fixating on criticism.
• Happy to fixating on something to be angry about.
• Equanimity to fixating on self generated feelings.
• Ease to fixating on the bad news in the media.
• Ease to fixating on sad love songs.
• Fun conversation to fixating on trying to convince.
• Great fun day to fixating about all the things we should be doing.
• Being abundant to fixating on what we do not have.

The following are some of the quickest ways we can go from fixation to living in freedom…

• Breathe!
• Get our energy moving!
• What could we be doing if we were not using my energy to fixate?
• Do something we enjoy.
• Take action on our creative ideas.
• Reach out and connect with someone we trust.
• Love yourself, no matter what the evidence.
• Think, feel and do things that make us laugh about ourselves.
• Think about  things we enjoy and respect about ourselves.
• If our blood sugar is low get something to eat.
• Rest if you are tired.
• Release fixated beliefs like “This is how life is” and “This is the way I am”.
• Allow withdrawal from our old fixated continuity.
• Expand beyond our upper limits of what we think reality is.

To our freedom,